Silence Reprised

A quiet day today.  So quiet, I am reminded of a famously critical review of a musical masterpiece written and premiered in 1952, the year I was born. I did not attend the performance, or read the review at that time, not yet having developed any musical taste, or the ability to read. That came two years later, But I digress.

The musical masterpiece was entitled 4’33″ It was in fact four and a half minutes of silence. The composer was John Cage, an American “avant-garde” and the critic, whose name I cannot recall, (and at this time I can’t find the reference on the internet) said… “Cage should write a lot more such works”. Lovely sarcasm… I wish I could remember who said it.

Not kidding. Read about Cage here..
And here… Things became really bizarre. Copyright on silence?

Now, As it turns out, Cage was an amateur!

I have a 23 minute recording of my own, (now available exclusively from me, as an mp3 or on a CD) of Marcel Marceau – entitled “Bip in the Wind”. I have to admit that it is actually a bootleg recording, and in fact Marceau was not actually present when I recorded it. In truth I had to stand in for him, as I could not afford his fees. So it was really more of a homage to Marceau. Well, in fact it was a tribute in the style of – except that I actually only recorded 2 minutes of silence and then opened the file in Nero wave editor, and multiplied it several times. More of a techno remix of a tribute homage bootleg recording. But you cannot spot the bits where I joined the files together! It is not only a masterpiece of recorded mime, but an astounding technical achievement in Sound Editing!

Nonetheless, despite these admissions, I maintain my recording is an original composition, a genuine work of art, and a piece that will one day be acknowledged as a masterpiece. What is more it will be seen as the artistic culmination of the genre. Superior to the work of Cage, and even better than John Lennon’s 2 minute attempt. It is seriously one thing I did better than John Lennon!

As soon as I learn how to play the electric guitar, I intend to record a full hour and a half concert of me not being Marcel Marceau not playing on the electric guitar, not playing “fur Elise” by Beethoven. Unplugged! To show my versatility I shall not accompany myself on the flute at the same time. Or maybe I will just join the file to itself a few more times. Who would know?

For a genuine signed CD of the full performance of this composition of mine send something really valuable of yours, like money, and a self addressed envelope. Or for a copy of the mp3 by email, just ask me nicely.

In the meantime I am going to sue the record companies and become extremely wealthy by proving that the silence between the tracks on all CDs published this year is actually an illegal copyright infinging sampling of my composition. They cant be allowed to get away with that. You can contribute by sending me any spare money you might have for my legal fund.

Author: Uisce úr

Though I am old with wandering Through hollow lands and hilly lands, I will find out where she has gone, And kiss her lips and take her hands; And walk among long dappled grass, And pluck till time and times are done, The silver apples of the moon, The golden apples of the sun.

One thought on “Silence Reprised”

  1. I look forward to this undoubted masterpiece and have sent you a set of Philosophical Thoughts valued at several times the cost of most things as pre-payment.


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