Once again I am lucky enough to have a doctor who gets the way I am. She has doubled my meds so the chronic pain is well managed, and the depression is mostly managed. Mostly.
I have a swollen liver, failing kidneys that may need replacing in a couple of years, grating knees, a partly disabled left arm, chronic pain from spondylitis or spondylosis or whatever of the spine , and fuck knows what’s wrong with my head. My left ear rattles with loud noises, since I popped an eardrum last year. It seems I didn’t give up smoking soon enough because I have problems with my lung function. The latest diagnosis. I now take a daily dose of Tiotropium* via inhaler each morning.
On the other hand I have a job that is not too badly affected by my mobility problems, in a remote community where no one cares if I shift my hours about to suit myself. I have employers who accept the way I work. I could consider myself lucky. I should consider myself lucky.
I turned 66 last week and I just need to stick it out a while more so I have enough saved to retire and go home, except I have no home to go to. All I can think about is a small boat and a cabin somewhere near the sea back in New Zealand.
*Tiotropium – A long-acting, 24-hour, anticholinergic bronchodilator used in the management of chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) an umbrella term for a number of lung conditions that affect breathing. Three of the most common are emphysema, chronic bronchitis and non reversible chronic asthma. Given family history, and my own history, we can guess which I have.